Lisboa Patisserie

08/07/09

Popped in for a quick bite of ham something or the other and a bacalhau croquette. Had to stick to the poor tasting coffee, as the tea was worse. Otherwise an enjoyable light lunch that was followed by a catalogue of the following that also acted as a catalyst for third degree dental surgery.

All of the above sweet stuff came to £5.70, compared to the £170.00 that's needed to fix my second molar, it was immorally satisfying. Dentists- what with the mass withdrawal from the NHS, the inclination to ban them from walking into my shop is so tempting.*

*It's the kids I sympathise with.

27/04/09

Black Coffee- pretty poor actually, I think I'll stick to tea next time.

Prawn Empanada- at least I thought it was

Don't bother, acquired taste- bloody horrible actually.

Dig in with not a care in the world

Any dental surgeons out there who won't charge the earth for sweet tooths like me?
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Ahackinhackney, this post is for you.

It’s not that I, or you for that matter, haven’t heard of Lisboa Patisserie. LP has always been one of those places that lingers in the back of the mind as some place that warrants a visit, but somehow it always ends up being a victim of the postponement phenomenon. One of the main reasons that delayed my visit here was its rather inaccessible (no Tube!) location of Golborne Road, or maybe that’s just a poor excuse. The best way to get to LP is by bus 23 from Oxford Street westbound and disembark at Golborne Road some six hours later (sorry I meant ½ hour). (Important note to those opting to travel by bus, avoid the school runs in the afternoon, you don’t want to altercate with the YoungOdiousBuffoonS!) Alternatively there’s always the epic detour of a walk via Portobello Road.

Just as Tottenham Court Road has the Centre Point Tower, Golborne Road hosts the iconic Trellick Tower designed by the wonderfully named Ernő Goldfinger.

Culture vultures, you now have an excuse to venture here with a cause!

I would be lying to suggest that Golborne Road is a perfect example of Middle England, no it’s a lot less restrained than let’s say a high street in Rutland; it’s quite simply a UNU (United Nations Utopia). On my second visit to LP today, Golborne Road seemed like an enclave for the Moroccan community, the proliferation of the peeps was due to the aftermath of Friday prayers. The people, atmosphere, colour and food stalls were collectively an amazing sight; worth a trip alone with the camera IMO.

As the name of LP adumbrates, it’s neither Moroccan nor French (the latter was insisted upon by Sergio, my local road sweeper of a pal who hails from Porto- he asserted, rather fanatically I may add, that it should be renamed Lisboa Pastelaria!). There’s absolutely nothing glamorous with LP, it’s simply a bakery with a few utilitarian tables and chairs thrown in. In fact the ambience of the place wouldn’t look out of place in Orwell’s 1984.

To all fans of fluorescent lighting, your prayers are answered bountifully. The place was as per usual packed, I couldn’t help but notice that the more mature men who occupy the tables are probably experts in making a cup of latte last for hours on end! Again like all places in London, English is either a second or non-existent language; but at least the Portuguese girls working behind the counter try their best with your questions! BTW, there’s always a queue here so try not to hold things up with your indecisions!

Now then, don’t even avoid the whole issue of Pastéis de Nata when coming here for the first time. If you've enjoyed Natas elsewhere in the capital, then you’ll love these more as they’re baked in-house and by golly they’re massively droolworthy! (word courtesy of S-L, ty).

£3.00 for the lot- dirt cheap

As mentioned earlier this place was encouraged upon further by Ahackinhackney, on hearing of my penchant for coffee, she recommended that I ordered the Portuguese favourite of Galao. Galao is basically latte by any other name, espresso shot milked down 3:1- it was easy drinking but the blend of beans used was in no way esoteric. Grade C+ or B-.
Bolo de laranja e coco- this orange and coconut cake thing was immensely scrumptious. You see the problem here is that the size of these cakes is smallish enough for one to nibble loads without knowing when to stop! Bless the waistline I would say.

My second visit I had this lot-

Almond Twist or something- perfect elevenses snack
Queijadas- I believe. Similar to the natas with blatant vanilla notes and the usual flakey base

Coconut macaroon jobbie- this was my favourite today, moist and gorgeous.

£4.10 all in- dirt, dirt cheap

I stuck to black coffee this time as I felt the galao was too ladylike. Coffee was again a touch above average.

Lisboa Patisserie is an absolute marvel and I think it quite rightly belongs to that category of 'one of London’s worst kept secrets'! Ahackinhackney, I hope to meet you here one day, thank you. A no-brainer recommendation.

The partial moral of this posting is there is no 'd' in Golborne!

57 Golborne Road
London, W10 5NR

Chinese Cakes and Whatever

30/03/09

Sun Luen snack bar on Little Newport Street, Chinatown

This is my first time here, very nearly seedy, both outside and inside.

Like all over Chinatown, service is abrupt- 'What you want?', with no hello, thanks or goodbye. I like that, at least I know where I stand with these folks!

Greasy situation

Chicken Curry Bun (Beef or plain Veg are also available)

Another deep-fried youcan'tputdown snack, quite surprised to find some decent pieces of chicken meat in there. Terrific.

Wife Cake- interesting background here.

The translucent winter melon and almond paste looks like aspic and the texture is like a firmer version of it as well. Although it's doesn’t possess a universally acquired taste the cake is good eating and not overly sweet. Eating can be incredibly messy due to the highly flakey pastry. Just to warn those with strict dietary requirements, the genuine article contains pork lard.

Coconut Bun

Simple and rather plain jane affair. The bread was incredibly fresh and soft. The desiccated coconut filling was heavily laden with marge. Only sweet tooths need apply.

Oh the fried dough sticks as well. £3.80 for the lot.

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Tired of mille-feuilles or chocolate cakes, then try some something different for a change

I don’t normally post on what I’m casually snacking or bingeing on. However tonight’s pig’s feast is a little exception. It’s a brief insight to Chinese bread and pastries. Chinese bread and cakes are to be honest nowhere near as refined or sophisticated as their Western counterparts.

Their cakes for instance are made not from fresh cream or real butter, but margarine with either condensed or evaporated milk.

The finishing touches to the eyes of a non-Chinese are garish and a confrontational ‘you-can’t-possibly-eat-that’ disbelief!

The dubious colour coordination is a surefire sign of authenticity- it can only stem from a Chinese bakery.

I’m pretty confident in stating that as much as 50% of Chinese pastries sold are fried (very deep in that sense).

Take the Yau Ja Gwai or literally Oil Fried Ghost. I’m not even going to discuss the incredulous origins of this snack, you can read it here. These fried dough sticks are inherently bland and they have a texture that can only be described as chewy choux pastry. As far as I’m concerned they were meant as a breakfast staple- in Taiwan they would be served with a bowl of hot soymilk, in Malaysia with a herby pork broth and of course there’s the dim sum special of Ja Leung.

I suppose it’s probably down to that usual weakness that corrupts all of us: everything that’s fried is twice as nice. Very greasy, very unhealthy, very addictive and I’m surprised the Scots haven’t adopted it as part of their diet!

Hum Jeen Pang or Salt Fried Biscuit is equally bad for the arteries. Gloriously deep-fried and it’s sold plain (salty) or filled with either glutinous rice, red bean paste or in this case Kaya. Kaya is coconut jam, to be honest the green (any nasal related comments here are wholly antagonistic!) colour is something I’m not used to, it should be golden brown. Like the fried dough sticks, the sensation of the excess oil trickling down the lips when biting into it is pure…best not get too carried away with hyperbolic speak! Go on try it, it’s easy eating and no strange ingredients save the trans fat to speak of.

Han Yan So is almond cookie. Don’t be deceived by the looks and assume they have the same chewy effect as the North American variety. These cookies are coarser, sweeter and crumbles all over the bloody place when it comes in contact with the teeth. Because of the high concentration of eggs and fat (veg I hope) used, they don’t keep well. Eat them on the day of purchase. Chinese tea as opposed to coffee is the best accompaniment for the cookies, tea rids of the excess oil a lot more efficiently. (Don’t believe me, go and ask any of those Chinese Medical Centres that appear every 100 yards or so in this city)

Oh this thing, strictly speaking it shouldn’t be included but might as well. Yes a lovely spring roll with lots of cabbage, beansprouts and a few shreds of chicken.

The photo might not be to scale, but this is indeed a more-than-filling specimen. Chilli sauce helps and not the sweet Thai variety please.

See I never mentioned calories until now. £5.00 for the lot, good value considering that’s a kilo gently put on for every Euro pound spent.

NB I get these delicious things from Kowloon Restaurant (I know I’m impervious to bad service, but this one takes the biscuit! Mega rushed service and no English or Cantonese spoken) and Far East Restaurant, they’re both on Gerrard St, Chinatown.